Safeguarding

Some tips to try

Three short pieces from the library, and the part of each you can act on tonight.

• UK Safeguarding for Parents New Here. Your school’s safeguarding focus is statutory. It is not unique to your school.
  • Safeguarding is statutory under Keeping Children Safe in Education.
  • Every school has a Designated Safeguarding Lead, the right adult for any concern.
  • Ask the DSL where you are unsure if something rises to the level of concern.
  theparentbook.com/parents/library/quick-tips/uk-safeguarding-for-parents-new-here
• Finding Something on Her Phone. The first move that helps is slower than the instinct.
  • Put the phone in a drawer in the kitchen, not back where she left it.
  • Sit down for ten minutes before going upstairs.
  • Open with: “I saw something. I am not cross. I want to help.”
  theparentbook.com/parents/library/quick-tips/when-you-have-found-something
• When the Relationship Worries You. He controls who she sees. Her phone is no longer hers. Pay attention.
  • Reflect what you see in her, not your verdict on him.
  • “I have noticed you are seeing less of Maya.”
  • Keep her friendships and activities outside the relationship alive.
  theparentbook.com/parents/library/quick-tips/when-the-relationship-worries-you

If you want to read further

• Your Child’s Online World. A chapter for parents who have seen something on the phone they cannot unsee. theparentbook.com/reader/online-life-beyond-screens
• Trauma in Childhood. A chapter for parents whose child has been through something, or whose family has. theparentbook.com/reader/the-shape-of-trauma-in-childhood

Worth your time

• A book for you: The Anxious Generation, Jonathan Haidt. 2024 book arguing smartphone-based childhood has rewired adolescent mental health; contested but widely referenced. uk.bookshop.org/p/books/the-anxious-generation-how-the-great-rewiring-of-childhood-is-causing-an-epidemic-of-mental-illness-jonathan-haidt/953c14657b042c9a

Where else to go

You do not have to be sure. Tell someone whose job it is to know what to do next.

• The designated safeguarding lead at your child’s school. Every school has one, by law. They are trained for exactly this conversation and they have the routes a parent does not. As soon as you have a concern about a child’s safety. Ask for them by role; you do not have to explain yourself to the office first.
• The NSPCC helpline, for adults worried about a child. A line for the adult who is not sure whether what they have noticed is serious. You do not need to be certain, and you can call anonymously. When something has been said or seen and you do not know what to do with it. They will tell you whether it needs to go further, and help you take that step. Helpline 0808 800 5000, Monday to Friday 10am to 4pm Email help@nspcc.org.uk, read 11am to 4pm, seven days a week; a message sent while the service is closed is not received. If it is closed and the concern cannot wait, call the police on 101, or contact the child’s local children’s social care, social work or social services team. If a child is in immediate danger, call 999. www.nspcc.org.uk

• NSPCC. The UK’s leading child-protection charity. The right signpost any time the chapter touches on a child being harmed. Any chapter where safeguarding may be live, where a parent suspects abuse, or where the chapter touches on online safety. The adult helpline is the right line for parents; Childline is the line for children themselves. NSPCC Helpline (for adults) 0808 800 5000 · Mon-Fri 10am-4pm by phone; email 11am-4pm, seven days a week. An email sent when the service is closed is not received. · If the NSPCC service is closed and the concern cannot wait, call the police on 101. You can also contact the child’s local out-of-hours children’s social care, social work or social services team. If a child is in immediate danger, call 999. www.nspcc.org.uk
• CEOP ThinkUKnow. The UK police’s national online safeguarding programme, delivered by the National Crime Agency. The right place for parents to report online sexual abuse, grooming, or any concern that may be a criminal matter. Any chapter where the online concern has tipped into something that may be criminal: sharing of intimate images, an adult contact who has been requesting personal information or images, sustained grooming patterns. The parents pages also carry age-by-age primers on what children are doing online, which I send parents to when they want a reliable, non-moralising overview from a source they can trust. To report something, use the CEOP Safety Centre at ceop.police.uk/safety-centre. The advice for families is at thinkuknow.co.uk. www.thinkuknow.co.uk/parents
• Internet Watch Foundation. The UK hotline for reporting child sexual abuse imagery online. Anonymous, free, and the right place when a parent has found something that needs to be removed from the internet. When the parent has discovered, on a child’s device or sent to a child, imagery that is illegal: sexual images of a child, including images of the child themselves. IWF will work to have the image removed. The report is anonymous; the parent does not need to identify themselves or the child. The 999 route is for immediate danger and ongoing abuse; the IWF route is for the image itself. The IWF takes down the image. Reporting the person who sent it goes to CEOP or the police, and the two usually need to run together. www.iwf.org.uk

The full list for safeguarding, with what each organisation does and when it is the right call, is at theparentbook.com/help/abuse-safeguarding/services