When Your Child Hits You

Being hurt by your own child is not a secret to keep, and there is help for both of you.

A three-minute read, three things to try, for ages 9 to 18.

Where to start

If your child turns violent, leave the room with the other children, and call the police if anyone is in danger. Call 999. Help is free and available at any hour.
This week, tell your GP or the school’s safeguarding lead what has been happening.
Fill in the form for the service that supports parents experiencing abuse from their children. PEGS (Parental Education Growth Support). Online at https://www.pegsupport.co.uk/support-from-pegs.
In the moment, get yourself and the other children out of the room, or the house. Don’t hit back, and don’t try to restrain an older or stronger child: you could both be hurt. If violence is being used or threatened, call the police. Call 999. Help is free and available at any hour. If anyone is hurt, get medical help. If your child hurts a brother or sister badly or often, or in a way you cannot stop, in either home, ask children’s social care for help that day: both children need it.
In England and Wales, parents can call a free helpline. Coram Family Lives, 0808 800 2222. Mon-Fri 9am-9pm; weekends 10am-3pm; closed bank holidays. Outside those hours the line is closed. Samaritans answer at any hour on 116 123, and Shout answer if you text the word SHOUT to 85258. Help is free. Scotland has its own. Children First, 08000 28 22 33. Email supportline@childrenfirst.org.uk. Mon-Fri 9am-9pm, Sat-Sun 9am-noon. Outside those hours the line is closed. If a child is in immediate danger, Children First says to call the police. Samaritans answer at any hour on 116 123, and Shout answer if you text the word SHOUT to 85258. Help is free. So does Northern Ireland. Parentline NI, 0808 8020 400. Email parentline@ci-ni.org.uk. Mon-Thu 9am-9pm, Fri 9am-5pm, Sat 9am-1pm. Outside those hours the line is closed. Samaritans answer at any hour on 116 123, and Shout answer if you text the word SHOUT to 85258. Help is free.
Your GP can start an assessment.
If you think someone may be hurting your child, or your child tells you so, stay calm, thank them if they have told you, don’t promise to keep it secret, and act that day. If the person hurting your child lives in your home or your child’s other home, go straight to children’s social care or the police. A national child protection helpline will talk it through with you. NSPCC, 0808 800 5000. Email help@nspcc.org.uk. Mon-Fri 10am-4pm by phone; email 11am-4pm, seven days a week. An email sent when the service is closed is not received. If the NSPCC service is closed and the concern cannot wait, call the police on 101. You can also contact the child’s local out-of-hours children’s social care, social work or social services team. If a child is in immediate danger, call 999. Help is free. Your child can also talk to someone themselves, without you in the room. Childline, 0800 1111. For anyone under 19 in the UK. There is a one-to-one chat online at https://www.childline.org.uk/get-support/1-2-1-counsellor-chat/. Help is free and available at any hour.

The rest of the tip, and why it works, is in the library.

Sources

Home Office, Domestic Abuse Act 2021: statutory guidance (2022, updated 2023), paragraphs 32 to 34; HM Government, Working Together to Safeguard Children (2026), paragraph 219; YoungMinds, Anger: a guide for parents (2024); NHS, Teen aggression and arguments (2023); PEGS, Understanding child to parent abuse, and FAQs (2026); Awoyemi, May, David, Majumder and Sayal, Quantitative and qualitative outcomes of Non-Violent Resistance interventions for children and adolescents with emotional and behavioural difficulties and their caregivers: a systematic review (Adoption and Fostering, 2025); Weinblatt and Omer, Nonviolent resistance: a treatment for parents of children with acute behavior problems (Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, 2008); NHS, ADHD in children and teenagers (2025), and Autism assessments (2026)

It goes with

The Child Who Saves It All for Home. A chapter for parents whose child is fine at school and furious at home.

The first chapter you open here is free to read in full.

Free on this subject

Behaviour. What to do first, what helps, and who else can help. Free to read and to print.
Safeguarding. What to do first, what helps, and who else can help. Free to read and to print.

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If you need help right now

If you or your child is in immediate danger: 999 · Go to your nearest A&E · 24/7.
If either you or your child is in a mental health crisis: NHS 111 · England, Scotland and Wales: call 111 and choose the mental-health option. Northern Ireland: call Lifeline on 0808 808 8000 · 24/7.
If your child is under 19 and needs to talk to someone themselves: Childline · 0800 1111 · 24/7 · www.childline.org.uk.
If you are worried that a child is being harmed or is at risk: NSPCC Helpline · 0808 800 5000 · Mon-Fri 10am-4pm by phone; email 11am-4pm, seven days a week. An email sent when the service is closed is not received. · email help@nspcc.org.uk · www.nspcc.org.uk/about-us/our-services/nspcc-helpline · If the NSPCC service is closed and the concern cannot wait, call the police on 101. You can also contact the child’s local out-of-hours children’s social care, social work or social services team. If a child is in immediate danger, call 999.
If you would prefer to text rather than speak: Shout · Text SHOUT to 85258 · 24/7 · giveusashout.org.
If you or someone you are worried about needs someone to talk to: Samaritans · 116 123 · 24/7 · www.samaritans.org.

If you need help right now

Published by Kensington Square Therapy. Company No. 16707111. Written by therapists registered with the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP) and the National Counselling and Psychotherapy Society (NCPS). This page is not therapy, and not a substitute for professional support. The full library is at theparentbook.com.