After something frightening

The sheet

For the first weeks after your child has been through something frightening, such as an accident, a fire or something violent they saw: what is common, what helps, and when to talk to your GP.

For the grown-ups · A4, two sides · Two pages · PDF, 65 KB

How it helps

After something frightening, most children are upset for a while and then recover, with the people around them. The sheet sets out what is common in the first weeks, what helps and what to avoid, and when to talk to your GP, with a table on the back for what you notice.

How to use it

1. Read it in the first days, on your own or with your child’s other parent. If the danger is still there, don’t wait: use the routes at theparentbook.com/urgent-help that day. Do the same if someone attacked your child or did something sexual to them, even if it seems over.
2. Keep to your child’s routines, check in now and then, and let them choose when to talk. Don’t ask for the details, and don’t tell them they should be over it.
3. Write down what you notice on the back, with dates, and tell their school or nursery what has happened.
4. Talk to your GP if, about a month on, your child is still very upset and finding everyday life hard, or sooner if things are getting worse or you’re worried. If they are under five, you can talk to your health visitor instead.

How to get this sheet

This sheet comes with a subscription. It is also yours with its chapter, if that is the chapter you read free, or if a teacher or therapist sends it to you. School staff and therapists signed in to their shelf can print it too.

The first chapter you open here is free to read in full, with its sheets. This one goes with Trauma in Childhood.

Free to print

These are free to anyone, with nothing to sign up for.

• A plan for a bad dayTo fill in together · A4
• Before you ring the schoolFor a call or a meeting · A4
• What to say: school and friendsCards to cut out · A4, eight cards to cut
• Before the SENCo meetingFor a meeting · A4
• Three reports, side by sideFor a meeting · A4 landscape
• The return-to-school meetingFor a meeting · A4
• The move to secondary school, for a parents’ eveningFor a parents’ evening · A4, five pages
• The last half-hour before bedFor the fridge · A4
• The worry ladderTo fill in together · A4
• Before you see the GP about your childFor an appointment · A4, two sides
• A record of what happenedFor a call or a meeting · A4, two pages
• The people I can tellTo make together · A4, two pages

Every sheet, marked free or with a subscription, is at theparentbook.com/printables.