Safeguarding

Where to start

You do not have to be sure. Tell someone whose job it is to know what to do next.

• The designated safeguarding lead at your child’s school. Every school has one, by law. They are trained for exactly this conversation and they have the routes a parent does not. As soon as you have a concern about a child’s safety. Ask for them by role; you do not have to explain yourself to the office first.
• The NSPCC helpline, for adults worried about a child. A line for the adult who is not sure whether what they have noticed is serious. You do not need to be certain, and you can call anonymously. When something has been said or seen and you do not know what to do with it. They will tell you whether it needs to go further, and help you take that step. Helpline 0808 800 5000, Monday to Friday 10am to 4pm Email help@nspcc.org.uk, read 11am to 4pm, seven days a week; a message sent while the service is closed is not received. If it is closed and the concern cannot wait, call the police on 101, or contact the child’s local children’s social care, social work or social services team. If a child is in immediate danger, call 999. www.nspcc.org.uk
• Children’s social care at the local council. The council team whose job is to keep children safe. You can contact them directly about any child you are worried about, your own or someone else’s. In Wales it is social services, and in Scotland the council’s social work department. In Northern Ireland it is the Gateway team at the local Health and Social Care Trust; nidirect.gov.uk gives each team’s details. The link below finds the team in England. When you think a child is being harmed, or is at risk of harm. Contact the team for the area where the child lives; if you do not know where that is, contact your own local team, the NSPCC or the police for advice. You will be asked for your details, and you can choose not to give them. Outside office hours, the council’s or Trust’s website gives the number to call. If a child is in immediate danger, call 999. www.gov.uk/report-child-abuse-to-local-council

For safeguarding

• CEOP (the police’s online child protection command). The National Crime Agency’s child protection command. Their parents’ pages explain grooming, image sharing and gaming risks calmly, and the CEOP Safety Centre is where you report grooming or sexual abuse of your child online. When what has happened online may be a crime: someone asking for images or personal details, or pressure on your child to share pictures. Report at ceop.police.uk/safety-centre. www.ceopeducation.co.uk/parents
• Report Remove (from Childline and the IWF). A free, confidential tool for under-18s to get a nude or sexual image of themselves removed from the internet, with Childline counsellors there if they want to talk. When an image of your child has been shared. Your child makes the report; you can sit with them while they do. www.childline.org.uk/info-advice/bullying-abuse-safety/online-mobile-safety/report-remove
• Internet Watch Foundation. The UK hotline that gets sexual images of children removed from the internet. The report is online, anonymous and free. When you have found an illegal image of a child, including one of your own child, and need it taken down. The IWF removes the image; reporting the person goes to CEOP or the police. The two usually need to run together. www.iwf.org.uk/en/uk-report

If there is abuse between the adults at home

• National Domestic Abuse Helpline (run by Refuge). A free, confidential line open day and night for women experiencing abuse at home, and for anyone worried about someone who is, with live chat too. When the fear at home is between the adults, and the children are living inside it. National Domestic Abuse Helpline 0808 2000 247 · 24 hours, every day; live chat Mon-Fri 10am-10pm, weekends 10am-6pm www.nationaldahelpline.org.uk
• Men’s Advice Line (run by Respect). A free, confidential advice line and webchat for men experiencing abuse at home. The same moment as the line above, for fathers. Men’s Advice Line 0808 801 0327 · Mon-Fri 10am-5pm; webchat Mon-Fri 9am-10am mensadviceline.org.uk
• Women’s Aid. Written guidance you can read quietly, a directory of local refuges and services, live chat, and a site for teenagers on what a healthy relationship looks like. When you are not ready to ring anyone yet. www.womensaid.org.uk/information-support
• Scotland’s Domestic Abuse and Forced Marriage Helpline. A free line open day and night in Scotland, for anyone experiencing domestic abuse or forced marriage and for the family and friends supporting them, with email and web chat too. When the fear at home is between the adults, and you live in Scotland. Scotland’s Domestic Abuse and Forced Marriage Helpline 0800 027 1234 · 24 hours, every day sdafmh.org.uk
• Live Fear Free (Wales). The Welsh Government’s free helpline, open day and night by phone, text, email and live chat, for anyone experiencing domestic abuse or sexual violence and anyone who knows someone who is. When the fear at home is between the adults, and you live in Wales. Live Fear Free helpline 0808 80 10 800 · 24 hours, every day; also by text, email and live chat www.gov.wales/live-fear-free/contact-live-fear-free
• Domestic and Sexual Abuse Helpline (Northern Ireland). A free line open day and night in Northern Ireland, for men and women affected by domestic or sexual abuse, answered by trained advisers. When the fear at home is between the adults, and you live in Northern Ireland. Domestic and Sexual Abuse Helpline 0808 802 1414 · 24 hours, every day www.nidirect.gov.uk/articles/24-hour-domestic-and-sexual-violence-helpline

If you are considering private therapy

Waiting lists are long. If you can meet the cost, a registered therapist can usually be seen in weeks rather than months. Both registers below are accredited by the Professional Standards Authority, which is the thing to check before anything else.

• BACP Therapist Directory. The British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy’s public register. Search by area, by what you are bringing, and by whether the therapist works with children. www.bacp.co.uk/search/Therapists
• NCPS Therapist Directory. The National Counselling and Psychotherapy Society’s register. Every therapist listed is qualified, supervised, insured, and accountable to a code of ethics. ncps.com/find-a-counsellor
• Kensington Square Therapy. Our own practice. We work with children, young people and parents, in person in London, online, and inside schools we partner with. www.kst.ltd

What to look for in a therapist, what a first session is like, and the questions worth asking before you commit, are set out at theparentbook.com/finding-a-therapist

Everything else

The full directory, across every subject, is at theparentbook.com/services. If a number here has changed, please tell us at hello@theparentbook.com and we will correct it.