When the Bullying Follows Your Child Home

Tell your teenager now, before anything happens, that you will never take their phone away because they told you something.

A two-minute read, three things to try, for ages 13 to 18.

Where to start

Tell your teenager now that you will never take their phone away because they told you something.
Keep screenshots of the messages, but never of a nude or semi-nude picture.
Plan the next step with your teenager, unless their safety means acting first.
There is one exception to keeping a record. If anyone has shared a nude or semi-nude picture of your teenager, or of anyone under 18, never view, copy, print, share, store or save it, or ask a child to send it to you. A screenshot is a copy. Get advice from the school’s safeguarding lead before deleting anything. If the picture is of your teenager, they can report it themselves to have it taken down. Report Remove (from Childline and the IWF). Online at https://www.childline.org.uk/info-advice/bullying-abuse-safety/online-mobile-safety/report-remove/. If an adult is involved, or someone is threatening to share a picture of your child or asking for money, report it to the police. CEOP (the police’s online child protection command). Report at https://www.ceop.police.uk/safety-centre/.
If your teenager seems low, stops eating or sleeping, or can’t face school, talk to your GP. If your teenager has hurt themselves, or talks about hurting themselves or not wanting to be alive, act that day: ask the surgery for an urgent appointment, and if it is closed, use the crisis line. England, Scotland and Wales: call 111 and choose the mental-health option. Northern Ireland: call Lifeline on 0808 808 8000. Help is free, confidential and available at any hour. Whoever answers may share information to arrange care or keep someone safe.
If your child is in danger or badly hurt, or may have taken too much of a medicine, get help straight away, even if they seem well. Call 999. Or go to your nearest A&E. Help is free and available at any hour.

The rest of the tip, and why it works, is in the library.

Sources

Internet Matters, Dealing with cyberbullying; UK Council for Internet Safety, Sharing nudes and semi-nudes (2024); Department for Education, Preventing and tackling bullying

It goes with

When Your Child Is Being Bullied. For parents whose child has just told them about being bullied.
Your Child’s Online World. For parents who have seen something on their child’s phone that they can’t unsee.

The first chapter you open here is free to read in full.

Free on this subject

Bullying. What to do first, what helps, and who else can help. Free to read and to print.
Online safety. What to do first, what helps, and who else can help. Free to read and to print.

The rest of the library

The Parent Book is a library written by therapists: chapters on the situations parents bring to our therapy rooms most often, quick tips for tonight, things to do together, and every sheet to print. One subscription opens all of it, from the day you join.

Subscribe to the library

£129 a year, by Direct Debit.

The Direct Debit is set up now and the first payment is taken on the next collection date. It renews each year on the anniversary of that payment. Change your mind in the first fourteen days and we refund you in full; after that, you can cancel at any time from your account page and read to the end of the year you have paid for.

Start your subscription

Already a subscriber? Sign in School staff: the teachers’ shelf

If you need help right now

If you or your child is in immediate danger: 999 · Go to your nearest A&E · 24/7.
If either you or your child is in a mental health crisis: NHS 111 · England, Scotland and Wales: call 111 and choose the mental-health option. Northern Ireland: call Lifeline on 0808 808 8000 · 24/7.
If your child is under 19 and needs to talk to someone themselves: Childline · 0800 1111 · 24/7 · www.childline.org.uk.
If you are worried that a child is being harmed or is at risk: NSPCC Helpline · 0808 800 5000 · Mon-Fri 10am-4pm by phone; email 11am-4pm, seven days a week. An email sent when the service is closed is not received. · email help@nspcc.org.uk · www.nspcc.org.uk/about-us/our-services/nspcc-helpline · If the NSPCC service is closed and the concern cannot wait, call the police on 101. You can also contact the child’s local out-of-hours children’s social care, social work or social services team. If a child is in immediate danger, call 999.
If you would prefer to text rather than speak: Shout · Text SHOUT to 85258 · 24/7 · giveusashout.org.
If you or someone you are worried about needs someone to talk to: Samaritans · 116 123 · 24/7 · www.samaritans.org.

If you need help right now

Published by Kensington Square Therapy. Company No. 16707111. Written by therapists registered with the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP) and the National Counselling and Psychotherapy Society (NCPS). This page is not therapy, and not a substitute for professional support. The full library is at theparentbook.com.