When They Leave Home

Two things change when a child leaves, and they arrive together. Your child’s days move somewhere you can’t see, so you’ll know much less about them. And at eighteen your child is an adult in law, so doctors and universities will deal with them, and will usually need their agreement before telling you much. Neither change means you stop mattering. It does change what is most useful from you.

This chapter covers the last year or two at home and the first years after. It is written mostly with university in mind, but nearly all of it applies to an apprenticeship, a job in another city or a year away.

The last year at home

Before they go, a young person needs to be able to:

• feed themselves for a week on the money they have
• keep track of that money
• register with a GP where they’ll be living, and order a repeat prescription if they take a regular medicine
• find contraception, or a test for a sexually transmitted infection
• get home safely at night, and know what to do if a friend can’t

A job, an apprenticeship or a year away needs the same list. An apprentice is an employee, earning a wage and getting holiday pay, so add the first payslip to it, and go through that together when it comes. Talking About the Apprenticeship Route is about choosing that route, and When A-Level Results Day Does Not Go to Plan about the morning a university place is in doubt. If your child leaves home before eighteen, for a university place or an apprenticeship, ask the university or the employer how it looks after under-eighteens.

Two health checks belong to the same year. The NHS asks students starting university or college to make sure they have had both doses of the MMR vaccine, and to have the MenACWY vaccine, which is usually given at school in Year 9, if they missed it. Anyone under twenty-five can still have it, ideally at least two weeks before they start. Ask the GP surgery.

The five things are easier to hand over one at a time, inside what is happening anyway, than as a syllabus. A seventeen-year-old boy who has never shopped for a week’s food might start with one supper a week that he plans, buys and cooks, with a set amount to spend; by the summer he’ll have done it thirty times. Cooking one thing together is a way in, if your teenager would like company. If your child takes a regular medicine, let them order the next repeat themselves, while you are there to help if it goes wrong: through the surgery, or in England through the NHS App, which anyone aged thirteen or over who is registered with a GP can use. The NHS suggests ordering up to five working days before the medicine is needed. If they’re due a GP appointment, let them book it and go in on their own; Their first appointment on their own goes through it in stages, and When Your Teenager Wants to See the GP Without You covers what stays private.

Let your teenager choose the order, and let them do each thing badly the first time. Doing it at home means a mistake happens while you’re near enough to help put it right. The activity Five things to learn before they go sets this out as a plan for the year, with your teenager deciding what comes first.

Talk about getting home well before the first night out: how they’ll get back, what they’ll do if they miss the last train or bus, and that they can ring you, or another adult you both trust, at any hour. While they still live with you, it’s worth agreeing a code word; A word that means “come and get me” sets one up.

### Drink, drugs, spiking and consent

Your teenager may have heard much of this at school. It’s still worth saying once, plainly, before the first term, because a good part of it is about looking after a friend. Alcohol and the First Parties covers the earlier conversations, and Low Mood, Drink and Drugs at Sixteen and Seventeen covers drinking or drug use that has become a way of coping.

Alcohol poisoning can look like confusion, being sick, slow or irregular breathing, pale or blue-tinged skin, a fit, or passing out. If your child thinks a friend has alcohol poisoning, your child should call 999 for an ambulance, and not try to take the friend to A&E. The person who answers the 999 call will tell your child what to do. If a friend is very drunk, your child should stay with them and not leave them to sleep it off alone: the friend could be sick while drowsy and choke. If the friend is awake, the NHS’s advice is to sit them up.

Spiking is a crime, and it is not the fault of the person who was spiked. The Home Office lists the signs as confusion, feeling or being sick, hallucinations or paranoia, poor co-ordination or vision, difficulty speaking clearly, and memory loss or blackouts, so spiking can look like being very drunk. If your child thinks they or a friend have been spiked, your child should get medical help, ask the venue’s staff for help, stay with the friend, and report it to the police early, because some drugs leave the body in under twelve hours.

If your child wants the facts about a particular drug, or you do, the government’s drugs advice service has them, for young people and for parents. FRANK, 0300 123 6600. Text 82111. Phone 24 hours, every day; texts and emails are answered, with no reply time given.

Sexual health services are free and confidential, from a GP or from a specialist clinic, and the young people’s sexual health charity runs services in many places for people under twenty-five, with advice for parents too. Brook. Online at https://www.brook.org.uk/parents-and-carers/. The NHS website has a search for the nearest service.

And talk about consent. In the law of England and Wales, a person consents only if they agree by choice and have the freedom and capacity to make that choice. Someone too drunk to make a choice, or asleep, is not consenting.

If your child, or a friend, may have been sexually assaulted, a sexual assault referral centre can give medical care and emergency contraception, and take forensic samples, whether or not the assault is reported to the police. It is best to go as soon as possible, and the NHS website finds the nearest centre. A sixteen- or seventeen-year-old is still a child in law, so the steps for a child apply too. If you think someone may be hurting your child, act that day, using the routes under “If you need help right now”, at the foot of this page; if that person may live with your child, in either home, go straight to children’s social care or the police.

Money

Student finance in England comes as two loans. A Tuition Fee Loan pays the course fees, and a Maintenance Loan helps with living costs: rent, food, books and travel. How much Maintenance Loan a student can get depends on where they’ll live and on household income. The amounts change each year, and GOV.UK’s student finance pages give the current ones. Repayments start only once the course has ended and the graduate is earning over a set amount, and they depend on what the graduate earns, not on what they owe.

The system changes for courses that start on or after 1 January 2027, which includes courses starting in September 2027. These are funded through the Lifelong Learning Entitlement, which still offers Tuition Fee Loans and Maintenance Loans, with the fee loan capped at a total of £39,160, about four years of full-time study. Students apply again for each year of the course, and those whose home is in Scotland, Wales or Northern Ireland apply to their own nation’s scheme. Disabled Students’ Allowance is covered under health, below.

Before your child goes, sit down once with the real figures: the loan, anything you can contribute, any wage, and the rent, which is paid first. Divide what’s left by the number of weeks until the next payment, and let your teenager work out what that buys. YoungMinds suggests budgeting together before a young person leaves. After that, the budget is theirs to run.

Agree before term what you will pay for, if anything, and when, and keep to it, so that money doesn’t have to come up on every call. If your child keeps running short, ask what’s happening before you send more. Sometimes the budget was simply wrong. YoungMinds notes that money can be a source of stress and anxiety for students, so if it keeps going wrong, ask how they are as well as what happened. If money runs out during the year, the university’s student services can say whether your child qualifies for its hardship fund, which usually doesn’t have to be paid back.

Your part, once they have gone

For most of your child’s life you have managed things for them: booked, reminded, chased and decided. Once they’ve left, you’re more use as someone they consult. You’ll hear about things after they’ve happened, your view will be one of several they weigh, and some of their decisions won’t be ones you would have made.

That makes you, more often, the parent who answers than the parent who calls. Let your child set the rhythm of calls and messages, and keep your side of it reliable: if you said you’d ring on Sunday, ring on Sunday. There’s no need to ration contact to help them settle. In an American study of first-year students who had moved away from home, how often they were in touch with people at home was not linked to how homesick they were. The activity How we will keep in touch is a way to agree the rhythm before the first term, with your child setting it.

Homesickness is very common in the first weeks. In the same study, 94 in every 100 students reported some homesickness in their first ten weeks. On average it eased a little over the term, faster for some students than for others.

Researchers who reviewed the evidence define homesickness as the distress or impairment caused by separation from home. It can come with low mood, anxiety, withdrawal and trouble concentrating, and when it is intense it can make the first year very hard to sustain; some students leave because of it. The first weeks are hard for students who stay at home, too. In a UK study from the 1980s, students’ distress rose after they started university whether they had moved into residence or were living at home, and it rose most in those who were homesick.

Student Minds, the student mental health charity, tells parents that ups and downs at university are normal, and that for most students, doubts about the course or the university pass with a little time.

Suppose an eighteen-year-old girl rings in her third week to say she has no friends, the course is wrong and she wants to come home. Listen before you suggest anything, then ask what would help. YoungMinds and Student Minds both advise listening first, and it is harder than it sounds when you are a long way off and want to fix it. Don’t decide anything big on the night of a difficult conversation, coming home included, unless your child has said anything about hurting themselves or not wanting to be alive, or you are not sure your child is safe tonight: then act that day, using the steps under “If you are frightened for your child’s safety”, at the top of this page. A visit can help, if your child wants one. For a young person who would rather not talk on the phone, YoungMinds also suggests texts or cards. The First Phone Call Back is about the other kind of call, the one that is short because things are going well.

Homesickness that comes with low mood most days, with your child withdrawing from everyone, or no longer going to lectures, needs more than listening. The section When it is not going well, below, says what to do.

Health, and what you can be told

### The GP, and medicines

Your child should register with a GP near where they’ll be living, in the first week, before they need one. In England, the NHS says registering is free, needs no ID or proof of address, and can be done online.

For a regular medicine, work out before they leave how the next prescription will reach them: which surgery will prescribe it, which pharmacy they’ll use and how they’ll order it. If the medicine was started by a specialist team, ask that team how it will continue once your child moves. If it runs out while they’re away, pharmacies can supply some medicines in an emergency without a prescription, though there may be a charge, and when the surgery is closed there is an urgent advice route wherever your child is. In England, Scotland and Wales, call 111. In Northern Ireland, contact your GP surgery during surgery hours, or your regional GP out-of-hours service when the surgery is closed. For a life-threatening emergency, call 999. If your child is under children’s mental health services, the move to adult services is set out in Low Mood, Drink and Drugs at Sixteen and Seventeen.

### What doctors and universities can tell you

From sixteen, your child is presumed able to make their own decisions about medical treatment, as an adult is, and what they tell a doctor is already confidential, as an adult’s would be. Once they are eighteen, their doctors need their agreement before telling you about their care, and the university works the same way: YoungMinds explains that a university will usually share information about a student’s health or wellbeing only if it is worried about the student’s safety, or the student has given clear consent.

What confidentiality doesn’t stop is your telling them. The government’s statement on information sharing and suicide prevention, which applies to adults in England, says confidentiality is no reason for professionals to refuse to listen to family and friends, even when the person doesn’t want information shared. You can always ring your child’s GP, or the university’s wellbeing service, and say what you have seen and why you are worried. The surgery or the service may not be able to tell you anything back. Either can still give you general information, such as how to get help in a crisis, and Universities UK tells universities that listening to a family’s concerns is one of the main ways they judge risk.

The same statement says professionals should ask people whether and how they want their family involved, and record the answer, and that information can be shared without consent where that is needed to protect someone from serious harm, as in an emergency.

### The trusted contact

Universities UK, which represents the universities, recommends that every student is asked at registration to name a trusted contact: someone the university can get in touch with if it has serious concerns about the student’s safety or mental health. It says the contact does not have to be a parent, that the student’s agreement is always preferable before a contact is involved, and that a university can decide to involve them without it when the concern is serious. These are recommendations, and each university writes its own policy, so read your child’s university’s, or ask.

As its pages stood in October 2026, the UCAS application doesn’t ask for a trusted contact. It offers “nominated access”, which lets a parent deal with UCAS, or with the universities, on your child’s behalf while they apply. It also asks whether your child has a disability or health condition, including a mental health condition, so that support can be arranged. UCAS says that answer is never used to decide an application. The trusted contact comes later, from the university.

So have the conversation in the summer, while your child is well. Who would they want the university to contact if it were seriously worried about them? Would they want their GP to know that too? They may choose you, someone else in the family, a partner or a friend, and it is their choice. Suggest they tell the GP as well as the university, since professionals are asked to record whether and how a patient wants their family involved.

### A health condition, a disability or a learning difficulty

If your child has a mental health condition, a long-term illness, a disability, or a specific learning difficulty such as dyslexia or ADHD, two things are worth doing before they go. Sharing it on the UCAS application, or later with the university directly, lets the student support team plan before they arrive, and UCAS points out that a diagnosis isn’t needed to get support. And in England, Disabled Students’ Allowance pays for study support that a condition makes necessary, such as specialist equipment or a note-taker. It doesn’t have to be paid back, it doesn’t depend on household income, and a needs assessment, which GOV.UK describes as “not a test”, decides what is provided. It does need evidence of the condition: a letter or report from a doctor or other medical professional for a mental health condition or autism, or a diagnostic assessment for a specific learning difficulty such as dyslexia, so gather it before your child applies. Apply early, alongside the student finance application, which for courses from January 2027 means through the Lifelong Learning Entitlement. The Student Loans Company tells your child within four weeks whether the application has succeeded, but the support itself can take up to fourteen weeks to arrive.

If your child is autistic, or needs any change to how they study or live, start with the university’s disability service; YoungMinds notes that it can help set up a support plan.

When it is not going well

From a distance you hear about trouble late, and often indirectly: calls that stop, or go flat; a child who is asleep in the middle of the afternoon; no mention of anyone by name; money that keeps running out. YoungMinds lists the feelings to listen for in a student who is struggling: being anxious or stressed, isolated or homesick, low or depressed, or under pressure to drink or take drugs.

Start with a plain question, and give your child time to answer it: “You don’t sound like yourself. How are things, really?” If they say they’re fine and you don’t believe them, say so kindly, and come back to it later in the week.

Then point your child to the two first doors: the university’s wellbeing service, which at most universities includes free counselling a student can refer themselves to, and their own GP near the university. Offer practical help with the first step. Stay on the phone while they ring, or keep a video call going while they fill in the form. If they have stopped going to lectures or have fallen behind, encourage them to tell their personal tutor or the wellbeing service now, not at the end of term.

Your child may also want someone to talk to who isn’t you. Their university may have a Nightline, a free, confidential listening service run by students for students, with hours that vary. Student Minds, the student mental health charity, has information for students. It is not a helpline; for text support it sends students to Shout, which is listed under “If you need help right now”, at the foot of this page.

Outside the university, there is a free service for anyone under twenty-five, on anything at all, with a text line. The Mix. Text THEMIX to 85258. Crisis text 24/7; counselling, peer chat and boards by arrangement. Help is free. Until your child is nineteen, they can also ring Childline, which is listed under “If you need help right now”, at the foot of this page.

If you’re worried, tell the university what you have seen. Find out now, while all is well, how it wants a family to raise a concern about a student, including out of hours, and save that number in your phone. If you can, visit, and keep the visit to a meal and a walk, with no list of questions.

Reports of student suicides frighten parents. Over the seven academic years to July 2023, the Office for National Statistics found that students in England and Wales died by suicide at a lower rate than people of a similar age in the general population: 6.9 deaths per 100,000 students, against 10.2 per 100,000 after adjusting for age. That is an average across all students, and it tells you nothing about how your own child is.

If you’re wondering whether to ask your child about suicide, ask. Samaritans says the evidence shows that asking someone whether they are thinking of suicide can protect them, and a review of the research found no sign that asking makes suicidal thoughts more likely. Ask in plain words, “Have you thought about ending your life?”, and listen to the answer. The library’s urgent help page, at theparentbook.com/urgent-help, has a step-by-step guide on how to ask. If the answer is yes, or it worries you, act that day, using the steps under “If you are frightened for your child’s safety”, at the top of this page. If your child is in immediate danger, call 999, and if you are not with them, give their full address, with the hall and room number.

When they come home

Some young people come home before the year is out. Some take a break from the course and go back to it, some leave and do something else, and many come home after they graduate, for months or for years. In 2025, nearly three in ten adults aged twenty to thirty-four in the UK were living with their parents.

If your child tells you they want to leave their course, the first useful question is what has happened, and the second is what they want instead. Don’t settle anything in the week they tell you. Before anything is decided, your child needs to talk to the university, which may be able to offer a break from the course, usually called suspending their studies; UCAS’s advice is to speak to the university first, and as soon as possible.

Leaving or suspending also changes student finance. A student who leaves or suspends has to stop their student finance and repay anything they’re no longer entitled to, and how much depends on the kind of finance, when in the year they leave and whether they plan to go back. A student who suspends because of illness may still get student finance while away; UCAS says that full student finance continues for sixty days for a suspension on health grounds. Any Tuition Fee Loan already paid out is your child’s to repay, and each university has its own rules on fees for part of a year. The Year Out Conversation and When Your Teenager Is Not Going to University are about what can come next.

You may be disappointed, worried about the money, or frightened about what it means. Say those things to another adult first. To your child, say what is true and useful: that you want to understand what happened, that leaving a course that doesn’t suit them can be the right decision, and that you’ll help them work out the next step.

If your child comes home to live as an adult, after graduating or between jobs, agree the terms in the first week, before anyone is annoyed: what they’ll contribute, in money or in jobs about the house; whether you want to know when they’ll be out all night; and roughly how long the arrangement is expected to last.

The family left behind

You may find the first weeks harder than you expected, or easier, and either can catch you out. The house is quieter, the shopping is smaller, and part of each day that was arranged around another person has gone. Some parents feel bereft. Some feel relief, and then guilty about the relief. For some, the feelings belong partly to their own leaving home, years ago, and to how that went.

It helps to notice which of these is yours, because each one pulls towards something: ringing more, visiting sooner, clearing the room, starting a project. Say what you feel to another adult, a partner, a friend or someone else who has done this. If you tell your child too often, they may start looking after you from a distance, and that isn’t their job. If you’d like to talk it over with someone outside the family, there is a free, confidential helpline for any parenting or family worry, including this one. Coram Family Lives, 0808 800 2222. Mon-Fri 9am-9pm; weekends 10am-3pm; closed bank holidays. Outside those hours the line is closed. Samaritans answer at any hour on 116 123, and Shout answer if you text the word SHOUT to 85258. Help is free.

If you live alone with your child, the change can be sharper, because the house empties completely. Plan some of those first weeks in advance: one thing a week that has nothing to do with your child, with someone you like. The Week Before Your Child Leaves is about the last days before they go.

When a child leaves, a younger brother or sister at home gets more of your attention and less of their sibling’s, all at once. Some like it and some don’t. Keep their routines as they were, tell them what is happening with their sibling in plain terms, and let the two of them keep in touch in their own way, a game or a group chat that doesn’t go through you.

Leave your child’s room as it is for the first year if you can. If you need it, tell them before they come home, and ask what they’d like kept.

When your child comes home for the first time, let the first evening be supper and their own bed. Ask about the course and the people later in the visit, and before they go back, ask whether the way you keep in touch is still working for them.

NOTES

1. GOV.UK. Become an apprentice: how apprenticeships work, last updated 14 October 2024. Apprenticeships combine training in a job with study; apprentices are employees, earning a wage and getting holiday pay.
2. NHS. MenACWY vaccine, reviewed 28 February 2024. Usually given at 13 or 14, in Year 9; anyone who missed it can have it up to the age of 25; students should ideally have it at least two weeks before starting university or college, and make sure they have had both doses of MMR.
3. NHS. NHS App, last modified 9 February 2026, and How to order a repeat prescription, reviewed 17 October 2023 (its next review was due 17 October 2026). The app is for anyone aged 13 or over registered with a GP in England; the ways to order a repeat, and ordering up to five working days before the medicine is needed.
4. NHS. Alcohol poisoning, reviewed 4 June 2026. The signs; calling 999 if you think someone has alcohol poisoning, and not driving them to A&E; the person who answers giving advice about what to do; staying with the person, because they could choke on their own sick or stop breathing; sitting them up if they are awake. The words about not leaving a very drunk person to sleep it off alone are the library’s, from the reviewed tip Alcohol and the First Parties.
5. Home Office. Spiking: advice and support, published 21 December 2023. Spiking is a crime and not the victim’s fault; the signs; what to do; reporting early, because some drugs leave the body in under 12 hours.
6. Brook. Sexual health clinic near me, last modified 16 July 2026, and Sex Ed: What parents and carers need to know, last modified 13 October 2026; NHS. Where can I get sexual health advice, now?, reviewed 8 October 2026. Free, confidential advice and treatment from a GP or a specialist clinic; Brook’s free and confidential services, many of them for people under 25, and its pages for parents; the NHS search for local services.
7. legislation.gov.uk. Sexual Offences Act 2003, section 74, revised text up to date to 15 October 2026, and section 75, up to date to 13 October 2026; NHS. Help after rape and sexual assault, reviewed 6 November 2024. In England and Wales, a person consents if they agree by choice and have the freedom and capacity to make that choice; where the complainant was asleep or unconscious, or had been given a stupefying substance without consent, the law presumes they did not consent unless there is evidence otherwise (section 75(2)(d) and (f)). Sexual assault referral centres offer crisis care, medical and forensic examinations and emergency contraception to anyone, whether or not the assault is reported to the police; samples are best taken as soon as possible; the NHS website finds the nearest centre.
8. GOV.UK. Student finance for undergraduates, with its part New full-time students, no date shown on the page (last public update 2 January 2025, in its metadata). The two loans; the Maintenance Loan depending on where the student lives and on household income; repayment only after the course and above an earnings threshold, according to earnings, not what is owed; amounts that change each year.
9. GOV.UK. Student finance if your course starts on or after 1 January 2027, no date shown on the page (published 30 January 2026, in its metadata). The Lifelong Learning Entitlement; Tuition Fee Loans capped at a total of £39,160, around four years of full-time study; reapplying for each year of a course; a different process for students whose home is in Scotland, Wales or Northern Ireland.
10. YoungMinds. University and mental health: advice for parents, reviewed January 2024. Budgeting together before a young person leaves; money as a source of stress; listening before fixing; texts, cards or a visit for a student who would rather not talk; what universities usually share; free counselling, usually by self-referral; the disability advice service and support plans; the feelings that suggest a student is struggling; Nightline; Student Space.
11. GOV.UK. Extra money from your university or college to study: university and college hardship funds, updated 19 December 2023. Hardship funds, decided by student services, usually not repaid.
12. English, T., Davis, J., Wei, M. and Gross, J. J. “Homesickness and adjustment across the first year of college: a longitudinal study.” Emotion, 2017, 17(1), 1–5 (full text on PubMed Central). 174 American students who had moved away from home, followed weekly through their first ten weeks: 94% reported some homesickness; on average it eased slightly over the term, with wide differences between students; it was not associated with how often students were in contact with people at home.
13. Thurber, C. A. and Walton, E. A. “Homesickness and adjustment in university students.” Journal of American College Health, 2012, 60(5), 415–419; abstract read on PubMed. The definition of homesickness; its links with depression, anxiety, withdrawal and poor concentration; intense homesickness making the move “difficult, even unsustainable”, and some students leaving.
14. Fisher, S. and Hood, B. “The stress of the transition to university: a longitudinal study of psychological disturbance, absent-mindedness and vulnerability to homesickness.” British Journal of Psychology, 1987, 78(4), 425–441; abstract read on PubMed. A UK study: psychological disturbance and absent-mindedness rose after the move to university for students in residence and students living at home alike, and the rise was greater in those who reported homesickness.
15. Student Minds. Student mental health support for parents, carers and guardians, last modified 24 September 2026. Ups and downs at university are normal; for most students, doubts about the course or the university pass with time; listen first and ask what would help; university staff are limited in what they can share with parents.
16. NHS. Register with a GP surgery, reviewed 28 July 2025. In England: registering near where you live; free, with no ID or proof of address needed; online registration.
17. NHS. Emergency prescriptions, reviewed 15 January 2024. Pharmacies supplying some medicines in an emergency without a prescription, sometimes for a charge.
18. NHS. Consent to treatment: children and young people, reviewed 8 December 2022 (its next review was due 8 December 2025); General Medical Council. 0 to 18 years: principles of confidentiality, paragraphs 43 to 49, no date shown on the page. Young people of 16 and 17 are presumed, like adults, to be able to decide on their own treatment. The same duties of confidentiality apply to children and young people as to adults: doctors ask for consent before disclosing information that identifies a patient, except where the law requires it, the public interest justifies it, or it is needed to protect someone from risk of death or serious harm.
19. Department of Health and Social Care. Information sharing and suicide prevention: consensus statement, published 26 August 2021. The statement applies to adults in England. The duty of confidentiality is not a reason for not listening to family and friends, even where a person does not want information shared; asking and recording whether and how a person wants their family involved; sharing without consent to protect someone from serious harm; giving families general information, such as how to get help in a crisis.
20. Universities UK. Suicide-safer universities: sharing information with trusted contacts, October 2022, downloadable from its page Sharing information. Listening to families’ concerns as a key factor in judging risk; families’ concerns to be heard and taken seriously.
21. Universities UK. Universities to involve trusted contacts when there are serious concerns about a student’s safety or mental health, updated 20 December 2022, and Sharing information, modified 13 October 2023. A trusted contact at registration, who need not be a parent; the student’s agreement always preferable; involving a contact without it where the concern is serious; recommendations, not rules.
22. UCAS. How to fill in the UCAS application and Filling in your UCAS application, both read in October 2026 (no page date; 2027 entry cycle). Nominated access, letting a parent speak to UCAS or the universities on the applicant’s behalf; no trusted or emergency contact is asked for.
23. UCAS. Sharing a disability or mental health condition in the UCAS application and Sharing a mental health condition on your application, read in October 2026 (no page date). The question on the application; who sees the answer; that it is never used to decide an application; that no diagnosis is needed for support.
24. GOV.UK. Help if you’re a student with a learning difficulty, health problem or disability, with its Eligibility and How to apply pages, updated 13 November 2024. What Disabled Students’ Allowance pays for; that it is not repaid and does not depend on household income; the evidence needed, a report or letter from a doctor or medical professional for a mental health condition or autism, or a diagnostic assessment for a specific learning difficulty; the needs assessment; four weeks for a decision and up to 14 weeks for support; applying through the Lifelong Learning Entitlement for courses from 1 January 2027; students from England.
25. Student Minds. Urgent support, modified 10 October 2025, read 28 October 2026. Student Space, which Student Minds led, is being merged into the Student Minds website (“We’re merging Student Space with the main Student Minds website”), and its pages now redirect there; text support through Shout, which it calls its delivery partner, and whose line is listed under “If you need help right now”.
26. The library’s standing crisis block, `crisisStandingBlock` in signposts.json: Childline is for anyone under 19 in the UK.
27. Office for National Statistics. Estimating suicide among higher education students, England and Wales: August 2016 to July 2023, 9 September 2025. Students had a lower suicide rate, 6.9 deaths per 100,000, than people of similar ages in the general population, 10.2 per 100,000, after adjusting for age. Official statistics in development.
28. Samaritans. Supporting someone with suicidal thoughts, no date shown on the page; Dazzi, T., Gribble, R., Wessely, S. and Fear, N. T. “Does asking about suicide and related behaviours induce suicidal ideation? What is the evidence?” Psychological Medicine, 2014, 44(16), 3361–3363, abstract read on PubMed; and, for the wording of the question, Samaritans York branch, Asking directly about suicidal thoughts can help save lives, 1 September 2023. Evidence shows that asking someone if they are suicidal can protect them; a review of the published studies found no statistically significant increase in suicidal ideation among people asked about suicidal thoughts; ask directly.
29. Office for National Statistics. Families and households in the UK: 2025, 17 April 2026. 28.7% of adults aged 20 to 34 lived with their parents in 2025.
30. UCAS. Suspending or withdrawing from your studies, read in October 2026 (no page date). Speaking to the university first, as soon as possible; full student finance for 60 days for a suspension on health grounds; responsibility for any Tuition Fee Loan already paid; each university’s own fee policy.
31. GOV.UK. Student finance if you suspend or leave your course, updated 8 November 2024. Stopping student finance and repaying what is no longer owed; what the amount depends on; finance during a suspension for illness.

Where to go further

YoungMinds, University and mental health: advice for parents The most useful single page we know of for parents of students. It covers what support universities offer, what they can and can’t share with families, how to keep in touch without taking over, and the services a student can use themselves.

Student Minds, Student mental health support for parents, carers and guardians From the UK’s student mental health charity, which has pages for students too. A short, sensible page on supporting a student from a distance, what university staff can and can’t tell you, and what to do if you are worried about their safety.

Dominique Thompson and Fabienne Vailes, How to Grow a Grown Up A GP who specialises in student mental health and an education specialist on what parents can do to help a teenager become independent, how pastoral care at universities and workplaces is changing, and how to recognise the signs of distress. It is worth reading in the year before your child leaves.